California Trip: Honey Badger Beer!

My time in SoCal was winding down quickly, so we decided it was essential that we fit in a day trip to San Diego before I headed back East. We had drunkenly invited Summer Boo to come with the night before, but I decided there was no way that could happen, so I made up a little white lie and told him we had slept too late and decided not to go. Oops. I like to think that I spared him from another day of being on the outside of multiple inside jokes--really I did him a favor. With that solved, we took off for the drive and I took in some more spectac Souther California scenery. San Diego was of course nice, but not what I expected. For one, it was absolutely filled to the brim with homeless people. It seemed like every other person we saw was an insane derelict person. My favorite was a shirtless man who parked his shopping cart filled with shit in front of a restaurant. He stood on top of a fire hydrant, waving his arms to the music which blared from his boombox, circa 1991. The city was also very military, which may sound snobby of me, but just ain't my bag, if you know what I mean. Now granted we did just stick to the downtown area, since this was a quick trip, so that could have swayed my opinion of the city. And yes it was a Thursday afternoon, but the area seemed dead. I have officially become the snobby New Yorker who thinks every other place but New York is "cute" but just can't compare.
The silver lining to San Diego (which in case you don't know, means "a whale's vagina"--there's an oldschool one we brought back for the day!) was the the strip of bars, more specifically one called the Tipsy Crow. It has the same idea as the Exchange Bar in NYC, where the drink prices fluctuate based on their demand and you can see the changes on a tv screen which looks like the stock market (this is all very official). But what the Exchange does not have, nor does any other bar that I have seen in New York, is Honey Badger beer. Yes you heard correctly.

The best part was, when I went to upload this pic onto facebook, the little tag square appeared around his ugly little face and asked me "who is this?".
We of course ordered this nectar of the gods, and it tasted pretty meaty (with just a hint of snake). This was the perfect ending to our quick, touristy trip to San Diego--we had to get back to the OC, where we had plans to of course, see a dj that night. The dj I speak of--Wolfgang Gartner, whom I had never seen. He was playing at the Yost in Santa Ana, where I had of course never been. We showered quickly back at Baby J's igloo house and housed down some gyros we had picked up on the drive back. Then we set back off, into the fog which had quickly come out of nowhere. It made for a mysterious drive and was just a strange feeling for my last night out of 2011 (Dec. 30 would be spent on my red-eye flight back to NYC).

The venue was pretty amazing, with a good view from anywhere. Drinks were cheap and it wasn't too packed. It was the exact opposite of godforsaken Pacha. The crowd was much better as well, except for the scary packs of mean-looking Vietnamese which I tried to avoid. Wolfgang was amazing and Baby J and I decided that I should try and marry him, to make my dream of being an International Party Girl come true. He also protected me from a creeper-one had apparently come up behind me to dance without me noticing. Baby J informed me that I had "a visitor" before pulling me away from him. The three of us danced and drank the night away, just like our old times in Hamburg. It was so good to be back with them and we couldn't bear to think about what was coming up in a few hours--Aussie's departure. She had an early flight for her South America tour the next morning but in order to avoid being stuck in traffic for hours, we had to get up at the crack of dawn, literally, to drive her to LAX. By the time we left Wolfie and got back to Baby J's we got an hour and a half of sleep before the evacuation alarm went off and we were back on the road. Even Cookies with a Smile couldn't improve our mood. It was a slightly tearful goodbye but we knew we would be reunited when the time came for our Australia trip.

Baby J and I went back and slept for a few more hours before we headed to a different part of Long Beach for crepes. We then drove back down the Pacific Coast Highway where we spent the afternoon sitting on the beach and walking on cliffs. We then went to meet his sister and some of her friends for happy hour drinks. Someone had chosen it to take place at a strange wine bar filled with olds. There was an old man making out with a much younger woman, with quite the muffin top, in the corner. But that would not be the best/worst of our entertainment for the evening. There was a group of middle-aged people, a couple and another woman with a dog, dancing along to the saxophone player. They looked like they had come straight of the Real Housewives of Orange County, plastic surgery and all. And waaaasted. Absolutely shit-faced. The couple was trying to dance around but were stumbling all over the place. The man let out a couple of extremely loud woots before heading back to his seat and promptly falling asleep. An old man sitting next to them tried to pet their dog, but it snarled at him and started barking. This woke the wasted man up and he shoved the dog in the carrier and dropped it on the floor. The couple then got up to dance again, but were basically standing in one spot trying to hold each other up. Meanwhile, the group of us watched all this in horror as their rounds of martinis kept coming. Who decided it was a good idea to keep serving these people?? But the crowning moment came, when after the couple had given up on dancing and returned to their seats, the woman suddenly leaned over and puked on the floor. Keep in mind this is seven o'clock at night. They then grabbed their keys and headed out. It is likely they are dead, which may not be a bad thing. But they did provide some winning entertainment for my last few hours in Cali. Not long after they left, we headed out as well, as Baby J had to drive me to John Wayne airport (makes me chuckle) for my flight back to NYC. Another sad airport goodbye. But a fabulous trip and a glorious reunion with my Hamburg besties!