Martin and Mason

It was my first weekend back after Thanksgiving and I was even more exhausted than I had been before the vacation. All that going out in Syracuse had been too much, not to mention a huge mistake. So I was easing back into the NYC lifestyle slowly. That Friday night I decided to forego partying and took up CB's offer to go to a free comedy show with her at the Gramercy Theatre. I hadn't seen any comedy yet in New York and it had been ages since I'd seen CB. She had plenty of updates for me--she had just returned from a Contiki Tour to Italy and had even bigger plans. She was going to be traveling to Thailand and Malaysia over New Years with an Aussie she had met on the Italy trip. I was wary of the Aussie, but also extremely jealous. And the real kicker was, she was going to be going to the infamous Full Moon party on NYE in Thailand. These are notoriously crazy and is something I need to do. It looked like perhaps I was being usurped for the title of International Party Girl....
Once inside the theatre, an attendant was assigned seating. This was a standup comedy show which was going to be taped and shown on Comedy Central. Pretty legit. Both CB and I were in shock when the woman led us to seats directly next to the stage, in the very front, in the line of multiple cameras. "You need to laugh a lot girls, you're going to be on tv" were her parting words. We were already laughing at the sheer ridiculousness of the situation. Luckily the comedian (Matt Braunger, who looked familiar to both us though we weren't able to place him) was actually funny and I only had to fake laugh a couple of times. Afterwards I headed home, early, which was unheard of for me, but I was in serious need of sleep.
Plus I needed to have some energy for the following night, which I had been looking forward to for awhile. GF and I were going to be seeing my fave dj, Martin Solveig. Unfortunately it was at Pacha, and I had purchased the tickets before the last Oakenfold/Pacha debacle. I probably would've reconsidered this decision had I known. But there was no turning back now and I was still really looking forward to seeing my Martin. I had the perfect shirt for the occasion (a tank top that said "HELLO" in neon letters) and I had even gone to American Apparel to purchase a sweatband. GF and I were meeting in Hell's Kitchen early to grab a drink before the show. Now Hell's Kitchen is apparently the new Chelsea, meaning it is the new gay mecca. Perfect for GF, and he knew the gayest place of all. It was a bar called Blazing Saddles, which essentially meant it was a gay Coyote Ugly. They had shirtless bartenders wearing cowboy hats dancing on the bar to country music. It was fillllled with gay guys and I was literally the only girl there, besides a pack of lesbians in the corner. When one of the gay cowboys was doing his dance routine on the bar, he tapped me lightly on the head, which I took to mean "Girl, wtf are doing here??". Despite what was going on around us, GF and I sat at the bar and had a fairly serious conversation, considering. I was spilling my worries to him about Mason. We hadn't texted at all during Thanksgiving and I hadn't seen him since our awkward dinner. Now he had been away for Thanksgiving and was moving into a new apartment, so I knew he was busy, but I was still worried. GF basically had to talk me down from the ledge once again, or at least help to eradicate the stories I was constructing in my head.

Interjection: Not long after this, Mason and I started up again. He invited me over to see his new place in Spanish Harlem, which was surprisingly nice. Our following dates included: going down the giant slide at the New Museum and seeing a ridic hipster band called "the Half Faggots" in Williamsburg--the hipsters were so hipsterish that they looked like they had special needs and they glared at us as we stood drinking our PBR (apparently that is out and Tecate is in).We were having fun together, though I would go through periods where I wasn't sure that I even liked him, fueled by the fact that we didn't really text, which was a stark contrast to Ibanker and I (we texted all the time). So who knows what will happen with Mason and I, though I feel like at this point, if we wanted to date, we would be. My pessimism for guys doesn't help either and I can't help wondering what fun surprise Mason will have in store for me. And I don't even try to calculate the condom count.....

"Oui, join us on tour s'il vous plait!"

After Blazing Saddles, GF and I went from one extreme to the other. Pacha was filled to the brim with bros, bros and more disgusting bros. I wanted to be right up front of course so we pushed our way, with much difficulty, towards the booth. Hardwell was opening and though he was really good, I was eager to see Martin  and then get the f out of the crowd. It was hellacious--GF and I spent the next 2 and a half hours pressed up against sweaty, jumping 22 year old bros with no crowd etiquette. GF basically had to hold me up, as the crowd kept swaying and I would've been trampled immediately. I couldn't help thinking that the club was definitely over capacity and if something happened (a fire, etc) we would have no chance. I did enjoy Martin immensely when he finally came on, thought I was upset that Lafaille wasn't with him and that he couldn't see my shirt. I had of course had daydreams of meeting them both and them asking me to join their tour, making my International Party Girl dreams come true! This dream was crushed at the same time as my foot, when a massive bro jumped directly on it. I screamed and GF decided then and there that he had had enough. We left, with him supporting me as I limped. We slowly walked to get a snack and we must've looked like we had just come out of battle. We were soaked in sweat and I could barely walk. My foot was swollen and had an indentation in it. Just outrageous. It was worth it to see Martin but I have since pledged to never set (swollen) foot in Pacha aka the worst club in New York ever again.