So Fidel and I had our scavenger hunt finalized and the only thing between me and it was a four hour long Bolt bus ride. It was of course late and I didn't get into Union Station until 11:30. This chopped a valuable hour from our drinking time. I rushed off the bus like a mad woman, basically sprinted through the station and burst outside, my eyes peeled for a cab. I spotted one and rushed over to it, realizing at the last minute I had cut the entire cab line behind me. I felt bad but I had a night to start. Luckily no one said anything and I hopped in a cab for the short ride to Chinatown. Fidel met me at her apartment and while I was speed getting-ready (and also chugging a Smirnoff Ice, hello high school) she informed me that she had arranged for us to start the night with some preliminary bros she knew from law school, who were in an apartment upstairs. Against my better judgment I decided to wear what I refer to as "the dangerous dress". It is pink, short and tight and had recently shrunk in the wash. It has gotten me into trouble in the past and I was slightly worried about where it would take me tonight. But no time to worry as the bros were waiting.
They escorted us to Rocket Bar and promptly ordered a round of Patron shots. These "shots" were as gigantic as the ones OG had ordered the weekend before. Between that, my Smirnoff ice, and a pretzel for dinner I was almost immediately drunk and the Hunt fell apart before it had even begun. For some reason we had a couple approach our group and ask if we wanted to play a round of some bar sportsgame (darts, foose ball, who knows) with us. Fidel agreed but then decided we should go to the next bar so I informed them we had to meet my boyfriend Ted and if I was late he would beat me. We obviously scared them off and were able to make our exit, me yelling something about Ted and what he a dick he is. A real charmer, this one. On the way to the next bar we tried to lose our current bros, as they were holding us back, but they were stubborn. Might as well take advantage. I waltzed up to the bar, ordered us two mixed drinks each and stood there, not moving, until one of the bros reluctantly took out his wallet (who apparently is friends with my SU law guy, ugh). Fidel and I then befriended another pack of bros from New Jersey. Previous bros eventually got the hint and let us be. I had an entire conversation with one of the bros though I don't remember much more than telling him I lived in New York. When he wanted to go dance I sat in the corner sulkily and refused to move. Fidel had buddied up with one whom claimed he was brothers with my bro--I think this was a lie. Nevertheless, we decided to go with them to get late-night Chinese when the bar closed. I was starving and this may have been one of the most delicious meals i have ever eaten. I drank the wonton soup out of the bowl at one point and possibly spilled sesame chicken on my lap. I looked like a disgusting animal but did not care.
While I was occupied with this, my bro started to get pissy with Fidel for some reason. I could see the tension building but kept eating. The breaking point came when he threatened to beat us. Yes, this charmer told us he was going to beat the hell out of us. I faux-whispered to Fidel, loudly enough for both bros to hear, and asked if she wanted to leave. She said yes. I turned to the bros, informed them we were going to the bathroom, then sprang from my seat and ran out of the restuarant, Fidel behind me, both of us screaming. We ran to the corner and stopped. Fidel thought we were safe but I decided we needed to keep going so we ran the 4 blocks back to her apartment, in our dresses, screaming like banshees the whole way. When we arrived we realized we had left them with the bill and promptly cracked up. I realized my phone was vibrating and when I checked it, it was of course beater bro. He had kept calling my phone during our run and I had, honestly, 19 missed calls from him. 19!! Plus a text that read: Hey. AnsWer your fone.
To make up for this, he sent the following text in the morning: Hey my bad on calling u 1400 times and sorry for what I said but I would love to go out with u again or take u to dinner while ur still in DC.
Yes, I think we really hit it off, after he threatened me with domestic violence. Geez.
I was also witness to Fidel's d bag boyfriend acting like an asshole. As some background, they are living together and she recently discovered that he had recently been carrying on a relationship with another (much younger) girl. Fidel was obviously having a hard time with this, despite BF's advice to just "get over it". She hasn't been able to forgive him, understandably, but unfortunately is unable to leave him yet. He apparently was not pleased with our antics from the night before. He was giving Fidel a hard time about hanging out with other guys; in the morning she came out of their room, almost in tears and announced to me that BF was mad at her. I was half-asleep and unaware that he was there so I retorted loudly "How the fuck is that his concern?!". This made for an uncomfortable situation when I saw him later that afternoon.
We decided to head up to her rooftop pool. I was trying to plan my night while also trying to push through my hangover, which was steadily getting worse (I'm sure the hot sun was helpful). I had had the idea before I had left for DC to try and hook it up with an exboyfriend. He was going to fix my broken, POS computer and I figured this could be my in, into his bed. Luckily for me, this did not happen. Instead I ended up hanging out with my friend AD (from Ultra) that night. After spending the day hungover at Fidel's, I trucked to the metro looking like an idiot in another short dress, big gladiotor sandals and my Euro trip trekking backpack. I arrived in Clarendon and AD and I ate gazpacho at our fave place, Le Pain Quotidien. It was delish, despite the fact that our waiter was a dipshit hippie. After we headed out to the Georgetown waterfront, as I had somehow never been when I was living in the area. We met a nice group of Arab young men to purchase our drinks for us. The cute one liked AD, as they always do, but the others were nice, even despite one's atrocious sandals. We chatted for awhile until they decided they were heading to Connecticut Ave. I wasn't interested in leaving with these guys so AD gave the one her number and said maybe we would meet up with them later. As they were preparing for their exit, one guy asked another who had the keys. The prostitute-looking Asian woman next to us overheard this--she bent over, smacked her ass and said while looking at all of us "I've got the keys!". We all paused for a minute in horror before they resumed their conversation and I turned away, taking a swig of my drink.
After the boys left AD and I headed deeper into Gtown. Our destination--Smith Point. The reason--McPoyle. I didn't like either of these things, as I had heard bad things about the bar and really had no desire to see that annoying idiot from Ultra, especially after he rejected my friend request on facebook. We arrived anyway and I (a girl) was made to pay $5 to get in, as I was not on the list. I've made a decision that I would like to punch everyone on that list in the face (excluding AD of course). This bar was filled with the most obnoxious people in DC (who are already pretty damn obnoxious to begin with). A bunch of uglies in pastel polos. I had two seperate guys bump into me then look at me like it was my fault. McPoyle was typical McPoyle, obsessed with AD, yet neither buying us a drink nor introducing us to his friends upon our arrival. Another one of AD's followers showed up soon afterwards--Boring Asian. He had gone to Electric Zoo with us last summer and wasn't exactly the life of the party. Luckily he was a bit better this time--he bought me some drinks and gave me someone to chat with while McPoyle harassed AD. He also hated the bar and wanted to leave as well and when we finally did, he bought us both Five Guys. Points for him. Afterwards AD and I cabbed it back to Clarendon where I promptly passed out. To be continued....
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