A Very Varied 4th of July Weekend

This weekend ran the gamut of things to do in NYC. The first night I was scheduled to see a DJ on Governor's Island. WHAT could be more patriotic??
I was super excited since this is the DJ I had tried to see with Hipster a few months back. I had convinced GF to come with me and I knew it was going to be a good, yet rowdy time, as it always is with GF. I was also determined to not get as wasted as the previous Friday night with him, but that plan went out the door as soon as we found out the set started much earlier than we originally planned for. After work (we did not get out early the Friday before 4th of July, wtf??) I rushed home, changed into my hammer pants and half shirt, housed half a plate of spaghetti and rushed over to GF's on the LES in record time. Upon arrival he had a bottle of Stoli raz waiting for me and made me chug a glass of an extremely strong Stoli raz and soda. I almost gagged multiple times but figured I didn't want to buy drinks on the island. GF is pretty hardcore and can drink a ton so in the cab he busted out two water bottles with more of this concoction. I drank what I could without vomitting while we were standing in line for the ferry but luckily had to throw it out before boarding. We chatted with some kids about house music until we arrived. It was awesome...there was sand and light up palm trees everywhere and THE Paul Van Dyk was already well into his set. The alcohol hadn't hit me yet so of course I guzzled the drink GF handed me. What a fail. We walked over to join the crowd in front of PVD. I was pumped to finally be seeing him in person, plus he's German so that added to it. Few things in this world actually excite me--Europe, Djs and free food are pretty much the only guarentee. So seeing a European DJ with basically no food caused my excitement to go terribly wrong. Awhile into the set I felt myself teetering. I felt GF grab on to me but it was too late. I hit the ground like a sack of potatoes. He picked me up and supported me but my knees were like spaghetti--he could only hold on to me for so long. He decided it was time for us to leave, me whining and stumbling the whole way. I was officially that girl, which I very rarely am. We took the ferry back, which I have no memory of (though I'm sure it wasn't that memorable). GF apparently took me back to his place, deposited me and went back out. I woke up several hours later, feeling like death and confused as all hell, before stumbling to the bathroom and passing back out. I had been waiting forever to see PVD and I saw him for maybe an hour and a half before my night ended. Fail. I repeat FAIL.
GF doesn't make it out of this night scott free though. He went to his fav gay bar and continued drinking until he was almost to my state. He took a cab back to the apartment and couldn't figure out how to swipe his card. He decided payment was unneccessary and bolted with the cabbie yelling after him. Once inside his gate GF waved him away, went inside and proceeded to pass out naked on his bed with the lights on and the door open.
Needless to say neither of us was in very good shape the next day. I was unable to leave GF's apartment until 6pm that evening (roughly 24 hours after the travesty had begun). I had to cancel plans with an intern who was returning to Hungary a few days after and I wasn't able to see her before she left. Another huge fail. The only good part of the whole experience was watching a few minutes of My Big Fat Gypsy wedding which may be my new fav show. When I was finally able to crawl out of bed I got some Chinese food with GF's roommate, ate about 4 pieces and took the subway back to my apartment where I promptly passed out.

I had to wake up early the next morning to catch the Jitney to East Hampton. Luckily I was feeling much better than the previous morning and I was very pleased at the service on this bus line, which differs significantly from the Greyhound. I was meeting my friend EC who was visiting her aunt and uncle's house and invited me out for the day. I was very excited to be getting out of the City and wanted to get extremely tan. Unfortunately the weather was not cooperative so we were forced to endure the other pleasures East Hampton has to offer. Mainly, people watching. It is just spectacular, in a sickening sort of way. The best NY accents I have ever heard in my life, lots of plastic surgery and designer bags. I pretty much hated every girl there who was around my age. But I love going to new places and it was great to see EC who has recently moved to the Midwest (and as a sidenote at least I was able to see the Hamptons at all, since of course Ibanker never followed through with his invitation....douche). Her family was also great. They had a big nice house (the exact opposite of my small dirty apartment) and gave me lots of food. Her uncle was super Italian and was wearing a purple shirt. Her grandmother was super Irish and told me not to get too drunk (I swear I didn't tell her about the dj incident). Her mother took us to lunch and then to see the Pollock/Krasner house and on the way there got a bit lost. She went to pull in the parking lot of a restaurant to ask a Latin worker for directions. At the last minute she changed her mind because "he probably didn't speak English anyway", which caused EC to almost loose it and me to as well, but from laughing. It was a lovely day that involved minimal alcohol, relaxation and girl time, which was exactly what I needed.
I took the Jitney back to NYC late that night and stumbled off the bus at 59th and Lex half-asleep. After a day spent in the Hamptons, New York seemed especially dirty. This was not an illusion. On my way to the subway I walked by a giant pile of garbage and heard a rustling. I was mildly concerned. Before I knew what was happening a colony of rats emerged from the bags and ran across the sidewalk directly in front of me. It was like a tumbleweed of rats--there must have been at least 15 of them and their tails were flapping everywhere. I remained perfectly still and tried not to panic. When I saw an opening I sprinted through it as quickly and quietly as I could, terrified that they would run across my feet. I made it through, and dodged into the subway stairwell, absolutely disgusted. My greeting back to New York.
The next day was the 4th and I had no solid plans. Since it was roughly 140 degrees out I knew I had to come up with something quick to get out of my deathtrap apartment. Luckily CB texted with plans for a hotel rooftop party. The catch was that it was old-time themed. Like 40s and 50s. I was concerned but decided that a new dress I had could possibly pass for this. Except when I put it on I discovered the zipper was broken. After a moderate meltdown where I debated not going, I finally decided that I couldn't bear to spend the afternoon avoiding my roommate so I settled on a very modern romper and wedges. CB, her friend and I took the subway to the Upper West Side where we met her other friend across the street from the hotel. She announced that she had some whiskey we could drink before going in. I still hadn't quite recovered from my Friday so refrained. The other girls agreed though and instead of pulling out the water bottle I expected she whipped out an entire bottle of Wild Turkey and took a swig right on the sidewalk. They passed it around then left it as a gift for a lucky homeless person.
We made our way into the hotel and took the elevator to the rooftop. There was an old-timey band playing and we decided that the singer was a perfect cross between Steve Buscemi and John Waters. I enjoyed one $15 cocktail and nursed it for half the night. It was a another nice, low key night with spectacular people-watching and an equally good view. After a couple hours we fought our way through the crowd where we could watch the fireworks (not bad 15 floors up) and afterwards fought our way onto the subway where we all headed back to Queens.
So my 4th of July weekend mixed some very unique, very NYC crowds--the house/guido crowd at PVD, the Sunday Hamptons crowd, and the old-fashioned/hipster crowd on the actual 4th.
Nowhere else but New York....